Dear Steve Hofstetter,
Your awful idea to make a Myspace profile for every goddamn city you molest can only be described as homosexual. Not, like, one guy tenderly making love to another guy who kinda looks like a girl homosexual...more like, two fat, handle-bar mustache bear-type faggot fucks jerking off on each other's chest hair homosexual.
You and the million other self-described "thinking man's comic" (a.k.a. "no one laughs at my horrid material so I should call myself a 'thinking man's comic' comic") fuckfaces need to quit clogging Myspace with your whoreshit* so we fans of real, good comedy can browse without getting so fucking angry as to waste our time and email shitdicks like yourself.
*No, I didn't misspell horseshit...the kind of shit you exude is indeed like semen-filled shit from a whore. Fucking get a handle on your Myspace, idiot.
Dear Richard Boettger,
You are so right. Having more than one profile on a community website is exactly like sex between two men. And your decision to email me rather than ignore me was completely my fault.
The thing that really gets me about your letter is that you felt you had to explain your own wordplay. Despite how clever you would like to be, you subconsciously realize that all the big words in the world couldn't make you come off as intelligent. And that may be the only smart thought you've ever had.
Fear not, Dick, I am already compacting all my myspace profiles into one. I got too many messages and friend adds to handle on all the accounts. That must be because no one laughs at my horrid material.
In the future, please waste your time with a hobby,