By Steve Hofstetter
I've been thinking
What do I really do so wrong?
I'm a pretty clean cut guy
I don't drink
I don't smoke
I don't do drugs
I don't cut, steal, kill anyone
Quite frankly, except for the fifth commandment, I'm a pretty law abiding guy
So why do I get screamed at?
Why can't I get through my house without hearing
"Steven get these dishes done!"
Maybe if I wasn't so good, she'd leave me alone
Maybe if I smoked or drank, or something,
She'd find it a lost cause, and forget about me
"Hey-I'll trade you a cigarette and a dime bag for a load of dishes."
"Throw in a C average and you've got yourself a deal."
Maybe she does it because she's afraid I'll turn out like she thinks my dad is
Maybe I do it because I'm afraid I'll turn out like her
Well, I won't change
I'll never clean up my room, only take out the garbage when it conveniences me,
And become a famous sports writer, who's rich enough to pay someone else to leave the dishes on the counter