Get a Girlfriend

Dear Mr.Joe,

I'm a girl and I want to get a girlfriend, but I have no idea how to tell if another girl would be into me. The only lesbians/bisexuals I've run into either have a girl (or boy) or look like some version of Rosie O'Donnell. How can I get a cute girlfriend, preferrably one that's not a slut?

Sincerely,
Liz

Dear Ms. Liz-

Didn’t I sound like I was in Gone With The Wind just then? “But, Ms. Liz. You can’t marry Mr. Ashley!” Ahh, a classic film. No movie has celebrated racial stereotype quite as well since.

Yeah, so on to this girl liking girls thing. You want to be able to tell when a girl wants you, huh? Well, if you figure that one out, freakin let me know cause I have no idea.

Hey, what if Scarlet O’Hara was a lesbian? Now THAT would make that flick a bit more bearable.

Thanks for writing. This was Joe College saying, “Frankly, Scarlet, mmmm….lesbians.”

Got a question about an aspect of college life? Want to be made fun of? Then this is the place for you! Send all your college-related questions to joecollege@stevehofstetter.com.

Joe College may or may not be written by Steve Hofstetter.